So I got my period. Finally. In related news, I reinstated my belief in God.
I managed to convince my mom that my hickey was a birth mark I have always had. She cried for an hour about being a terrible mother for never noticing it.
Is it bad that your cum tickles when I swallow it?
don't worry dude, we didn't fuck on your bed out of respect for you
couldn't find a condom?
basically
i woke up with "only hugh can prevent florist friars" written up my arm ... i need to know what we did last night
11am puke and rally. THIS is what I'm gonna miss about college.
So High I just made Cadbury Coffee. I don't know what it is yet, but it involves Cadbury Eggs and coffee.
Just learned the hard way that dicks can bruise the back of your throat to the extent that you cant eat. You're dead to me.
I am currently sitting on a candy bar to warm it up cause it was in the fridge so I can eat it while watching the last song and smoking weed by myself
You take your time. Wallowing in last nights filth is the best way to get over a hangover
We were tripping too hard to figure out to tell him where we were so we sent a picture of me laying outside the tent saying "find us"
Everything is just really out of control. I hear puking from three different parts of the house. Roger has black eye from being punched. Kaiser tried shaving his head, but somehow burned himself. Music is bumping, but everyone is either puking and calling out for help or blacked the fuck out.
The extent of "getting it in" was this creepy guy sticking his finger in my bellybutton
Don't remember our skype call last night too well, but did I pee while skyping you?
I woke up on the couch screaming in pain. I don't know how ended up there or why my foot was double the size. all I know is I'm now in a cast and never drinking tequila again. worst hangover ever.
Randomize
