my computer doesn't work...
why?
i puked on it last night
That girl really should ne nicer to her vagina. It's not a playground.
Apparently hers is a theme park.
16 and pregnant actually makes me really happy that i'm gay
I left a bag of circus animal cookies in my car all day. they melted together into on giant cookie. this could either be the best or worst thing ever
i just ran into my boss at the liquor store. we didnt exchange words, just nodded in mutual understanding.
He left a trail of vomit straight from our dorm to the bathroom. Looks like we have our identities for the rest of the year.
I don't remember much, but my night is dated pre-Jaeger and post-Jaeger. Also, my boss may or may not have tucked me in.
Are we playing "how much awkwardness can we fit in the final 29 hours of 2011"?
yes yes we are. Go do something with super glue. i don't want to win.
The dude at Coffee Bean just handed me my tea latte and whispered, "pomegranate blueberry is such a sexy flavor". With a wink. I'm almost certain that there's an STD floating around in my drink.
I don't need you anyway! I have puppies and booze!
Oh I'm definitely going to hit on her, there's no question about that. What I meant by playing it cool is I'm not going to mount her on sight.
I only drink at bars with bathrooms big enough to have sex in.
He wore pink swim trunks on our date and repeatedly insulted my profession, but his cat kept standing up like a person to nuzzle my face and I felt like a Disney Princess. I hate this dude, but the cat is too amazing for me to not fake interest for.
so evidently blowing a guy does not mean he will say hi to you when he sees you in class.. in case you're ever wondering
because he's a firefighter, wouldn't sleeping with him be like saying thank you to the community?
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