Was i wearing a white blazer when you superpoke danced me??
I don't know what your problem is but seriously you're a cunt for throwing up that song on your page. It's rude as fuck
omg its myspace i didnt think anyone took that seriously anymore
I'm about to cry with happyness at the beer that will be consumed
i love beer. I convinced myself that I'm going to ace the exam tomorrow. I can't even do that when I actually study.
I had a pretty decent weekend -- aside from dropping the baby on her head. That.. That I feel bad about.
I woke up to him climbing naked through my bedroom window with a bottle of jd in his hand. Of course I had sex with him.
we managed to turn Dream Phone into a drinking game. don't hate.
If you come, call before you come in. I'm tanning my balls. Enjoy that visual.
How sad is it that I'm looking in the farm & garden section of craigslist to find a weed dealer. I mean, that's where they'd be right? Just gotta break the code.
Drunkness level: fluent in olde norse
In the ER with Chelz, I may have broken her ankle during sex. Lovely.
I am lonely and hungry. I need a girlfriend, but I'd settle for my mom.
Fireball goes down like mother's milk. Btw your housemate is naked
My talents include parallel parking and over reacting about absolutely everything.. And drinking..
Dude, the worst part is I can't even pretend it didn't happen because she posted a video of it on Facebook.
Randomize
