Hahaha, sighhhh...I texted him to no response. It's a shame, really...I would gladly exchange my body for pizza rills.
How do you jack off and text at the same time?
On my iPhone they have an app for that
So I thought I was slick leaving his room this morning all incognito. Little did I know I was wearing his football jersey with his name across the back... stilettos & my bra was left behind. never seeing that again
Just kissed her with a dip in my mouth... She was either too drunk to notice or too cool to care
Just saying. If you end up in canada tomorrow morning at least youll have my text to remind you how it happened
I introduced him to the male G-Spot. Don't ever tell me I'm not experienced.
We had to put his head at the bottom of the driveway so the puke would run down. Now he's sleeping outside.
Honestly I think at this point I purposefully schedule nothing on Sundays anymore so I can spend all day wallowing in my shame.
Apparently I walked to Denny's in the pouring rain without shoes just socks last night. Excellent.
Well then sir I'll probably see you tomorrow after my class and at 3 with your clothes off. Sounds like a solid way to start the weekend to me
Being with her was like shitty sexual fear factor big ass sausage nipples over sized outty belly button i was scared and drunk tell know one
A place where it's acceptable to show body parts is not a good place for me to be.
He asked if we were going to take advantage of his drunken state. When we said no he tired to show us what we were missing out on. It was so sad it almost made him cute.
I WILL KICK YOU IN THE FUCKING THROAT IF YOU EAT MY FUCKING ICE CREAM.
I have cats now. Five of them.
Have you considered starting a global domination firm?
Randomize
