that knocking you heard last night......that was her head slowly going through the wall
I would give up sex for lent, but I think Jesus would understand that I went too long without it to go back now.
She asked me how I live with myself. I told her one night at a time.
He went down on me and then slapped my ass saying "thanks for the confidence boost"... is this all I'm good for?
My ATM looks so different sober.
Well you really should've thought of that before you painted your walls the same color as your toilet
Omg he's telling my parents stories about him doing jaagerbombs ... Lord help me
i think i traded my wallet for a tim hortons gift card.
I was making out with him, and then his friend randomly took off my pants and started going down on me. My first semi-threesome was a success.
I don't even care that his girlfriend will be there. Us hooking up is a tradition and she will NOT ruin it.
My goal is to go an entire semester without cocaine. That's an adult goal right?
I don't know what I'm more pleased with, the blowie last night or that fact that there's still 20 dollars in my wallet
He handed me a beer to drink as he went down on me. I want to keep him
I just peed on myself the semester has officially began.
I found my parents stash of sex toys. You know my green one? My mom has it...in purple. I HAVE THE SAME VIBRATOR AS MY MOTHER
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