It would be worth it to see how drunk he is right now.
He cartwheeled into the side of the neighbor's garage.
Ok, i'm coming over
i'm going to be one of those im-wearing-a-shirt-as-a-dress girls today. dont make fun of me, i need laid
Can we talk about the cons of throwing up in the bathtub. there are no pros.
...she just doesn't genetically have the things I want my kids to have.
her facebook's as public as her vagina
Apparently telling a group of crying girls that it looks like they need a visit from Dr. Phil isn't the best pickup line.
And at least you didn't have a dinner of Ranch Pringles and Double Stuff Oreos. I forgot that part of being single.
i have 90 minutes to kick this food poisoning or josh's first experience with buttsex will be his last
I always thought The Big Bang Theory wasa terrible show but that was before it came with blowjobs and pizza.
Not gonna make it. My ovaries are playing laser tag
I gave up great shower sex to be here so don't say I never did anything for our friendship.
Stop talking and go back to bed. You're in the kitchen in your underwear and slept in your car.
I peed in front of kids, unfortunately
my mom is drunk and is trying to get me to take a picture of her ass. what is life?
His penis is average but his stamina is amazing!!! I didn’t know I had that many orgasms in my body!!!!
Randomize