Myspace is for pedophiles and tweakers in the 818 trying to hook up. I always forget theres music there too
halloween costumes for girls are easy, slutty teacher, slutty cop, slutty nurse, etc...
exactly, that's why i want something interesting
slutty neuroscientist?
Its only.eleven and we are already chasing a man on a bike with a bag full of burger king
So I saw the nuva ring just lying on the counter at Planned Parenthood...did u know it's just a ring? I could go to the Dollar tree buy a plastic bracelet and shove it up there instead.
You do that. Then go have lots of unprotected with your harem of booty calls and see how that works out for you.
Tell them you aren't trying to make money, you are just the mr rogers of weed,its such a good feeling a very good feeling the feeling you know that were friends
My hands always smell like pizza crust when im hungover.
Dad's teaching me to make moonshine this weekend as "college prep". How scared should I be sis?
I realize designer coke was a douchey thing to say but the point of the story is I did bath salts
I think I fell in love with her when I saw her kick a freshman in the chest
Yeah, reverse cow girl. She was on top and I was playing Flappy Bird behind her back. Easiest way to have angry sex.
where will you be at 9:30 tonight?
piledriving you in your roommate's bed?
I've never had sex with me but I assume there are worse ways to be woken up.
It's Scottsdale, it shouldn't be this hard to find drugs.
I told him I just left the convent and really wanted a man. He fell for it. Sure beats telling him I'm a nympho stalker that followed him to the bar when I saw his beard.
So, I can officially cross "getting eaten out in a church confession booth" off my bucket list.
Randomize
