i saw a guy balancing a black cat on his head last nite
get a pic
i tried he was too far away anotherguy was walking with paper bags on his feet explain that
i want ur life
i have now learned nap means the same thing as sex in college
Ordered my mom Mother's Day flowers online and moved on to internet porn. Do you think this is some sort of Freudian slip?
i'm drunk and confused. there might be a 4 year old here.
4pm on a Sunday....roomate fucking like a wildabeast while I have a organic chemistry study group in my kitchen.
My clit ring got caught in his beard. Never. Again.
I'm driving up the street and can't tell if my ears are actually about to pop or not.
A solid 8.5 on the baked meter, I need to stop.
I ate her out for so long I might actually shit a vagina
Now back to adults eating hotdogs.
I asked him why he was eating an entire can of refried beans, the only answer I got was "revenge"
There is a 90 percent chance I threw up in a mailbox last night....
You don't know how emotionally damaged I am from crashing into that park maintenance van. I'll never ride a bike because of it.
is leaving the club to fk in his friends van subtle?
He came over in a blaze orange vest with a case of beer and a shotgun yelling about "Dove Season" then passed out in the lawn. There he lies
They were so sore! Either I have bed bugs or you were biting my nipples last night and don't lie to me.
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