school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
i am making flyers for the homeless letting them know about free chipolte day
At barnes & noble, drinking beer out of thermoses, lookin legit.
that coffee was exactly what I needed. Also whose awesome hat is on the couch with ear flaps? I wanna put my head in it
You text me last night that you invented a new food. Cheese-less grilled cheese. Congrats, you made toast.
I woke up on a futon with 2 stolen budwiesers in my purse, 5 extra bucks, a sucker stuck to my shoe, one sock, and a stolen copy of the zombie survival guide
please tell me this is not legit
I wish i could call my weed and hear it ring. That's how i found my phone.
He fell and asked for a beer and a band-aid.
HE GOT FOURTEEN STICHES
I had a dream last night that you and me were eating cheesecake and according to my FATHER I was moaning really loud in my sleep. I seriously have issues.
5am is far to early to be on jagerbomb number 6 right now
Watched him slip somethin into her drink. Dragged him of his bar stool, punched him out, and told her what i saw. Bartender used some chemical to confirm presence of rophynol. Just woke up at her place
I just sold my hat for three car bombs. I call that a win.
I think he might be using me for sex. I also think I might be ok with that.
I woke up naked wrapped in a wolf blanket on the bathroom floor
I got really stoned and got my certification as an ordained minister. How productive has your day been?
Randomize