she looked like she should be chained to micheal vicks radiator
just broke no shave november. hello backed up drain december.
woke up in nothing but a glued-on tiger tail. they used super glue.
i woke up with a wedding ring drawn on my finger...if this was vegas id be worried
He wouldn't let me go down on him. He stopped me and told me he was a giver.
I need a pic of your cock for our cock collage
He threw up in the campfire, the alcohol in his puke caught on fire. Im marrying this man
I'm like a walking PSA for tequila shots
He just sent me the contact information about getting the Zebra for graduation...
I'm going to be drunk and braless all weekend. Let the festivities begin!
The ONLY place I sext is in my anatomy class. It's an amped up level of playing doctor.
Can't tell if waking up covered in easy mac is the sign of an amazing or terrible night
It's not my fault, Tequila turned all my alarms off.
Also: that bruise on my leg where you left like 3 sets of teeth marks keeps getting run into the corners of desks and shit. And I can't even complain to anyone at work
Do you remember feeding the vacuum doritos last night?
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