Bitch is talking to much, howd u ever get her 2 shut up?
It's worth it.
How worth it?
Back door worth it
It smelt so bad when i tried biting off her underwear that i didn't want to touch with my mouth
I woke up to you in just boxers at my door at 7a.m. with you saying how many squrriels you counted on the walk back, then you made me penis shaped pancakes
We broke two of his toes while having sex. He laughed said he'd fix it in the morning and kept going. I think I'm in love
There are beer cans & oyster shells along the side of the road. I belong here
it's a "shave your legs in the cvs bathroom" kind of night
I was sitting on the floor of CVS chugging white grape juice until someone asked me to leave.
We had three bowls going. It was a tri-bowl tournament. Harry potter shit.
I just gagged from thinking about the amount of tequila we will be drinking. DRUNK TUESDAYS
You should kill a bro for me and drag his carcass home so I can study him.
I changed my birth control schedule so that I'm on my period while you're gone this week
I don't deserve you.
I no longer exist. I have transformed into a puddle of sex.
I'll be home soonish I need 4th of July sex, it's the American thing to do.
I have a cat for love and a booty call for sex. What else could I need?
We need to know if his feet match his cock.
Randomize
