i'm three days dirty after drinking 14 hours last night and some other questionable behavior (hula hooping at a large concert, for example) i will just always bring the class. and the sluttiness.
Grab the Coors Light. Its time to get NASCAR drunk
We can grow old together and our livers can fail together
I don't know... But I do think this is probably the longest series of texts we've written discussing your cock. David was right, it is a brave new world. Also, slow day at work again?
mhmm. we know where to go, which places have free bathrooms, how long you can be in one until its sketchy, we have this down to a science. we're like the college sophomore pregaming dream team
I think I'm going to add the date I dumped his sorry ass as a life event on FB.
I think that's justified.
There is a special place in Hell for whichever one of you put Ben Gay on my dildo. It was a very uncomfortable April 1.
I wouldn't be too worried. He's been known to chase a chubby before.
THAT IS NOT HOW YOU TALK TO YOUR SISTER
When did we go from stumbling drunk into an ER at 3am to dinner double dating?
Were you the one who yelled "FOR GLORYHOLE!" then punched a hole through my door?
I've come to the conclusion, I should prob have at least 20 hr supervision. I would say 24, but I'm guaranteed to pass out for at least 4 hrs a day
Between his smile and monumental dick even the virgin mary woulda blown that man and I am far from the virgin. I didn't stand a chance.
On a scale of 1 to 10 how good of an idea would it be to pregame at the airport right now
Ten
You invited these random guys into your apartment that you met in the hallway...& then you started screaming at them to get out cause you didn't know who they were.
Good thing he's hot and my vagina likes him or I'd be at Dennys right now.
Randomize