Give me one situation where peeing in your garage could be a bad idea
Just saw a girl i'm pretty sure is simultaneously jailbait and a milf. I never want to leave mexico.
I mean we had sex in a crib. You tell me how my night was.
ATTN: We are officially 15 weeks from our annual "Get-Mega-Stoned-and-BBQ" event. Start saving up the proper supplies. That is all.
She just came home holding a fire hydrant. Yes a fire hydrant.
think of it as grooming, as if he is my Kate Middleton and I'm grooming him to be a presentable princess
So he's compensating for a really small penis. Either that or he's a drug lord.
Congratulations, you've begun to unfuck your life.
Do you think Brian would let me smoke while we fuck? I'm not sure ill survive exams without a constant nicotine intake
Good night I hope you dream about knitting and threesomes
Naw but when she was in the bathroom I threw the condom out the window and I'm pretty sure it hit some girl
Serious question: does drunken cyber sex with a stranger on omegle count as cheating???
He's nice to look at and knows the difference between your and you're. I win.
He wants to buy me a wedding ring and pretend to be married to someone else when we fuck. It actually makes me wet thinking about it.
Homeboy just asked me to strip for him. He should not be this horny and allowed to be in Vegas with his kid.
Randomize
