Someone shit on the floor
quick I need to know all the foods that the very hungry caterpillar ate
there's chicken and sequins in our bathroom sink. part of me almost wants to know what happened
Also I got A jello shot for $2!!! It's like the forever 21 of bars
the fact that i fell through a skylight is the least humiliating part of the night
I am nonfunctional stoned. I had to ask ben to put me somewhere away from all the people I'm sitting on someones bed watching a wall. Not alright. Should not have come.
Eating this pizza pocket is like eating out god
Absinthe night with my dad again, I could get used to this being home thing.
You were saying you didn't want to go home and insisted that I drop you guys off at your uncles. That's how you ended up sleeping on a porch with two dudes
I can't tell if my bong is gender-neutral or not
When God was sprinkling self control to everybody, he ran out and was like ehhhh she'll make it!
Woke up to your boyfriend in my bed last night. What's that about?
I mean, I bought pot and shampoo before I ran out. I think I can adult.
Broke my ankle and blacked out on my scooter last night. 'Twas grand.
It's nice doing the walk of shame at 530 am, the birds are chirping, campus is empty, and it's dark so noone can see who the Fuck you are
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