to do: lose virginity to hamster dance
I hate fucking guys that don't drink coffee. My morning hangover and shame will not be cured by your stupid tea.
He said we were driving the golf cart through the woods screaming 'iceroad truckers' for four hours in the dark
The pick up line I used was "Grab my sack, you'll be back." Then I winked at her.
He was in a gay KY jelly commercial. Jew male model. Reasons not to sleep with him. Go.
I managed to make myself a bowl of apple jacks, took one bite and had to stop eating them because they were making my brain wiggle. How was your comedown?
didn't realize her mom was home while we were fucking, but she's oddly okay with it. she made us food afterwards. but then kept talking about having grand kids the whole time. is it time to bail?
Guys always stop talking to me right around the point that if they bought me food a couple times I would probably have sex with them.
Lesson learned. Don't roleplay with a real knife.
Dude...I slept walked to the free condom bin in the lounge last night. I don't know why.
If i'm forever fucked up in this state of mind then I'm going to kill him for this
I don't trust a bar IN TENNESSEE that doesn't have Jack Daniels.
He suffocated between her tits, but she didn't notice because he still came.
IN OTHER NEWS did you guys see Orlando Bloom's penis today? I did
She was cute in her own little way. Shit, free taco's makes anyone hot.
Randomize
