and im sitting here waiting for them to work on my car. in a room full of men. that are too old for me. its like a sausage fest nightmare...
he pulled a hernia and i had to get the morning after pill. you tell me how our valentines day went.
my neighbors garage sale is really cutting into the time of day when i can smoke weed on my deck.
He had the smallest penis i'd ever seen. I can see why he drinks his life away.
You guys don't happened to be dressed as gladiators, do you?
You get drunk and try to bury your girlfriend in the sand JUST ONCE and all hell breaks loose
At some point i could of swore that you were in my bedroom riding a manatee last night..... I like my new dealer
This baby is an asshole
So really what you're asking for is an allowance to not have sex on our futon.
There something liberating about walking through the dorm hallways without pants on.
I AM NOT LOSING TO SOME FICTIONAL CROSSDRESSER
I never realized the effects a broken spine would have on my sex life
That's why i need nudes. Plutonic nudes.
Don't worry about me. I am infinite.
Mom got drunk as hell, crashed Dad's wedding and some how left with the best man. This is why you should be glad you aren't my sibling.
Randomize
