There really should be an "avoid ghetto" option on my GPS.
doooooooo herrrrrrrrr
I'm out of practice. be my yoda
put your penis in her you must.
ps... at the end of one of the videos you yell "let's do the eiffel tower again.. i'll be in the middle!" .. i almost died lolol
connan obrien reminds me of an asparagus spear
The coffee and champagne are fighting over who gets to absorb the one pancake in my stomach
for future reference: anal bleach BEFORE boozing
You tried to pay the bartender in graduation checks, I think you'll be fine in the real world.
I want you to tape your fingers together and give me a lobster claw hand job.
surprisingly enough, it isn't that uncomfortable to have sex with a heart monitor on
I need to figure out how to tell my doctor that I don't want to fix my possible fertility problems until AFTER I'm done whoring around in my 20s.
Why can't I hire someone to teach me how to be a decent human being?
Looking through my moms phone and find a pic if a dick. Scarred for life.
he spent an hour trying to rescue a bug from the sink. turned out to be a sesame seed.
The best part of the night was you shouting "I have to take the LSAT tomorrow" between shots of fireball.
Alright if I email the police department asking for my mug shot do you think they will email it to me
Randomize
