its no coincidence her full name and "cling" are the same in t9
You're the only person I know who would say "we'll play it by ear" referring to a threesome
I had ketchup on my elbow and a random girl goes "I got it" and licked it off, only on game day
Maybe STDs were invented to keep stupid people from having kids.
You have to figure out where to put this turtle dude
We'll talk about this tommorrow when I'm not mistaking my fingers for French fries....
I'm just gonna get real fat and join the circus.
on a brighter note, the cop thought i could kick adams ass if it came down to that and said he had $20 on me if it ever happens
My chest smells like french fries. Get at me attractive men.
I agree and I would be an awesome dog
I know you've been in hospital with meningitis, but last night I walked into a streetlight and bruised my penis so who's really suffering here
This is the fifth time tonight that girl has taken off my pants. Take me home. Now.
Answered a bio test question bc of watching phineas and ferb. Remind me to always drink when studying.
I woke up in a boat, with a life jacket on, tons of beer cans and no lake... I was inside a garage. WTF
you said you didn't feel like drinking anymore so you mixed vodka with your applesauce and ate it
Randomize
