he showed me his boner with his cell phone light during the movie.
i jus got home and totaly forgot i had nut all over the back of my shirt
..im mad u rememberd about that
We had sex in front of Notre Dame Cathedral, but I lost my wallet. God giveth and God taketh away.
Apparently I joined a band last night. Definitely my favorite blackout.
I just watched a guy pee from a second floor window onto the line of 100 people waiting to get in.
You yelled "GET TO DA CHOPPA" and burst through her screen door and disappeared into the night. With the goose.
His kisses tasted like beef jerky and captain morgan. I'm pretty sure I came before he even took my clothes off.
First booty call in Europe.. In Barcelona. With a German. In broad daylight.... Is that how they do it here?
Well you know it's going to be an interesting night when the bathroom attendant is doing hail marrys
Awkward sister question: which game of thrones female left would you fuck?
My dad is blowing up my phone with pictures from the midget wrestling match.
It's gonna be me and some oreos tonight. Basically like sex
so i was thinking... those 6 am shots weren't really needed.
You don't have to buy me dinner, watch tv or even hang out if you don't want. Just fuck.
Dude you came into the room last night soak and wet and told me you just took a shit in the shower
Randomize
