so tomorrow. i'm thinking coinstar then adderall?
the drag queen on stage looks like shes wearing the EXACT same dress i wore 2 senior prom.
the sex wasnt even worth changing my sheets
i realized our last day of finals is on cinco de mayo....it's god's way of saying drink ridiculous amounts of tequila and wear sombreros
Wydf in so deruk i just dowwned a packet if salt waitibg for food at del taco
i decided what we are doing for your 21st b-day: camelbacks filled with margaritas
Do you think I could put your penis on reserve for tonight or tomorrow night?
some guy just burried his vomit in the sand.
I'm ultimately at thr Shariton to drink and ppssibly puke on fancy shit. Thats my story and Im sticking to it.
i got two bottles of merlot and sorrows to drown, you in??
Do you know how disconcerting it is to hear the sound a dog makes while it drinks water and find out that it's someone eating you out?
When you wake up, just ignore the mess in the bathroom. I'll take her home when I'm off work.
apparently while i was high i thought that putting a dinosaur temporary tattoo on my inner thigh would keep me from taking my pants off and having sex with him...
...it didn't...
I currently look like a drunken mermaid, god I love beach parties.
Texting people and counting condoms..we have like fourteen. Goal for this week: use all of them
Randomize
