Well, it's 24 hours till finals. I need high A's on all of them and I still am not sure where exactly on campus most of my classes took place.
I just used my med student white coat as ID to buy beer at 9 in the morning
We can't have sex anymore. The amount of money I've spent on meds and copays for UTIs is getting ridiculous
Guess who just hooked up with the cop that fingerprinted her?
they arrested me when i was peaking, i'm pretty sure they were specifically looking for me but i was too busy rolling around, loving the grass to notice the police car..
Are you asking me on a date where we get shithoused and do some fingerpainting?
I'm standing in the shower drinking with the light off and a candle lit, listening to Amy Winehouse. Be proud.
I definitely pole-danced a parking meter outside a party last night. The cheering was appreciated.
The topic of sex in the jamba banana suit has come up on multiple occasions. We're just waiting for a moment to try it out.
Ok thats it i need a list. Full names, nicknames, in which frats, with a photo, of all the guys youve hooked up with because three of the same guys is ridiculous
The fact that we all screamed by Felicia to a bitch actually named Felicia will be a highlight of my life
That's crazy. Wow that lady must be fucked up
Yeah I hope she's okay.
I'm still going to fuck her husband but I do hope she's okay.
Her new crush is a 6'2" guacamole baron that may also be a Jedi.
#tbt to when you let me put plastic wrap on your balls and hum a little song
Yeah, but having a dick this size has ruined 3 marriages.
Randomize
