awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
i told him i was gay. he said that gay guys are supposed to be pretty.
u sent me just one boob. one just doesnt do it for me. u dont get full on a half a rack of ribs u need a full one
i know, but like... i wanna be a CLASSY i'm-stealing-your-date kind of slutty...
of course. lets lasso hookers.
and that's why he's hiding in the taco suit
I may be Daddy's little princess, but doesn't mean I can't be the blowjob queen.
Theres a picture of me with cut up clothes rolling in the policeman's lawn, I missed you, summer.
Guy, there will be accountabilities this weekend that you will need to respond to, or else.
i'm going as a slutty football player, and all night i'll drunkily whisper "id love to catch your balls." into random strangers ears.
I got to the party and found your shoes in a bag of Funyuns. You weren't even there.
I forced myself to puke in my garbage can, and the next day I bought a new one and burnt the old one. You could say it was a rough night
Roomies told me I showed up to my house alone with no pants on and burrs in my hair... I live in the middle of the city
thanks for passing me through your vagina 20 years ago today. your the best
We've been together for 10 months. These next 2 may be a deal breaker. He has not met the summertime version of me that is so hungover today that I cancelled a meeting with my boss right after she sent me an appreciation note saying I have great work ethic. I have her fooled.
Randomize