your profile still reads that you like women...interesting? I think there is some photography and video that will show otherwise
Nothing commands respect in a meeting like Jack Daniels on the breath. You're fine.
I'm drinking ghetto ass mojitos!
Wow. How can mojitos be ghetto?
Squirt + bacardi limon + limes = ghetto mojitos
Having an 'SDSU Mom' sticker is just like say 'Hi, my daughter has an std"
he just fed my chickens on farmville...i guess that's his way of saying thanks for the sex<3
You were demanding water from a bottle but I didn't have one..so I just took the water bottle from the hamster cage. You're welcome.
just found out they live across the street from coke dealers... rethinking the new years resolution
There are 18k people at the game and I'm next to the one guy who pulls his underwear down to his ankles to piss.
Our penis' have led to more networking than mark zuckerberg.
Whatever dude, just dont tell her your first impression was she looked like your cousin. no judgement here. just sayin.
The last thing I searched on my phone was "leave in conditioner on cats." This is where my life is.
We spent 45 minutes searching the crevices of our friend's car with a pair of tweezers trying to find the acid that we dropped
Every time Brady gets sacked I cum a little...
I mean I did fuck her boyfriend, the least I could do is post happy birthday on her Facebook wall.
got laid for being an eagle scout again. 4 more and ill have all my merit badges.
Randomize
