He saved me in his phone as Easy Jen. Should I be offended?
I wouldn't worry about it. He has me as "Sex Puppet."
and you said cock pushups were impossible
I was so drunk last night I wanted to download a Busta Rhymes album.
What can i say im a girl who smells like weiners.
At the ER. Dropped bottle lead to cut foot which led to me drunk hitting on doctors. Not going well.
She apparently grabbed another girl and pulled her into the shower fully clothed. When the girl was like "you need to stop" she curled up into a ball and refused to leave.
Whoa, you know how to pick em.
Ripped lines in the bathroom before my presentation.. Got bonus marks for my enthusiasm.. This is why I love drugs
I accidentally lit my hair on fire and we broke the bed. How was your night?
I threw up in a mitten on my drive home. Wow.
That BJ in the bathroom was definitely worth the $20 cover.
Based on his face I'm positive he has a beautiful penis.
Slammed 3 beers and just bowled a 129\nI guess alcohol IS the answer
Im just drunk enough to admit that I miss Hannah Montana.
I put him in the supply closet, used the copy paper to build a fort around him and his wheelchair, then he fucked me in the fort.
please don't ironically join a cult
Randomize
