Hey kate, how is it?
sloppy...it's emily. kate just tried to do a keg stand. they dropped her. we're leaving.
there are singles shoved down my panties. this is the type of summer job i always wanted.
I don't understand why we need a holiday to become more aware of boobs...
I asked about his 3 inch scar on his chest. It's from when he had to castrate a bull on the estancia. Apparently this is how good bull meat is made.
i think the bruises are from the grocery store. on separate occasions. i've been spending a lot of time drunk at the market lately.
i have a vague recollection of being in the parking deck around 4 this morning, and on monday morning i was naked on the roof.
that would mean it's on tape
I don't know what's worse, the fact that my parents own a sex swing or the fact that my little cousin was playing on it
But i guess when you use blowjob as a verb you are entitled to some language allowances
He managed to scream "cowabunga bitch" before he went down on me. Let me know if you still like him.
As he was under the stripper backwards, he yelled "we should totally be facebook friends"
I know it basically makes me the worst feminist ever, but I don't want to kill my own spiders. And I will pay my personal spider hit man with sammiches and unlimited , uninhibited access to my vagina.
Hey nothing wrong with those! I can't believe the guys who let me see where they live on first dates. Even more surprising, I don't stalk them after they've done me wrong.
His friend still there? Be like "I need to see both of your dicks ASAP"
Congrats you've received dick pics from an Olympic silver medalist
I just do things that aren't classy the classy way.
Are you alone?
No, but I have to leave him in my bed while I go on this date.
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