Apparently he's never heard a queef, he totally thought I farted and got freaked out.
my facebook is like a giant collection of my one night stands
I don't think the TSA agent thought getting iced while searching my bag was as funny as I did.
She is putting glow sticks from her bedroom to the bathroom. She is calling it 'Being prepared'. God help us all tonight...
Just bought an airhorn. Bad things will happen.
is pulling out brownies in the middle of class on 4/20 just too obvious?
stop bragging. last time i got laid i got double pink eye, and it was so not worth it
after last halloween when i met that 26yr old guy from russia who was hot until we madeout and he became obsessed with touching my forehead after the ecstasy he did and then tried to sell me pills from an m&m mini container, i think im staying away from parties downtown
Thanks, college. Tonight's decisions brought to you by margs in a nalgene.
Idk. I'm naked in front of the computer eating ribs. All is right with the world.
That's so nerdy and hot at the same time.
His dad gives me dirty looks whenever I come over though. I think it's because I eat his food and have sex with his son.
i just teared up watching channing tatum in drag emerge from the fog on lip sync battle. it's gotta be PMS. either that or something is realllllly wrong with me.
We just had sex on an abandoned logging road while wearing snow shoes. God bless Montana boys.
Im bringing my light up rubber ducky just in case we end up at a rave tonight. HE CHANGES COLOR!
I party with great urgency now.
Randomize