you asked the guy at 7-11 if he remembered when you came in and threw news paper every where... then you did it again
Come home. Power Hour by yourself is only fun for the first 10 minutes.
At least the cops kept you away from sleeping with her. Protect and Serve.
The heaters out again. Makin a fire in thebroke toilet for warmth.
But don't worry I didn't actually get stitches, although according to the health center I probably should have
That's true. There's really no bad time to take a Vicodin.
It is the Reeses peanut butter cup of pharmaceuticals.
I got kicked out of the hotel after wandering into the banquet kitchen at 2am trying to find the shrimp....so we're power napping in the car and then driving to madison.
Matt. This is the manager of qdoba. Pick up the phone. Your friend needs you.
some dude just accurately guessed my height and bra size.. that is cup AND inches around. creepy, yet impressive
Yeah, I'm sure we have time for sex AND ihop.
Well, personally I like to keep my blackmail in well organised folders.
He drove me to my therapist appointment because I was too drunk to drive. Total keeper.
Hahahaha. He sent me a dick snap in the lululemon stockroom. What is life. If this works out, this could benefit everyone....
Literally just took 6 shots in the shower..I’ve got this.
are you the reason the first floor girls' bathroom smells like weed?
Randomize
