I just saw a homeless man dressed as a pirate. I love san francisco.
omg a stripper jus od'd on stage.
I was dancing barefoot on glass at one point. That really sobered me up.
Just learned how to deliver a baby.the things i saw tonight can never be unseen
Is it bad that John just came to my work to have sex with me bc I felt bad that he slept on his porch last night locked out and I missed all his calls?
What I thought it would be sexy pouring melted chocolate down here chest, ended up in second degree burns. Hot food and sex do not mix.
The polaroid of me taking a test-tube of Jegar out of the gay guys mouth pretty much explains my trip to Spain.
I feel like a blind man at a water park. Every step has the potential to be either fatal or lead to accidental, but totally enjoyable, sex.
So watch family guy till our brains melt and then bang till our bodies hurt?
Its like her house is inhabited by 50 year old lesbian water color artists with a throw pillow fetish
Ok ladies its the usual spring break system. 5 for a guy, 10 for a non-lesbian girl and double points is its a group thing. Hottest guy of the day is an additional 15. GAME ON
IF IT WALKS LIKE A MANWHORE AND QUACKS LIKE A MANWHORE, HE PROBABLY HAS VD.
Hopefully they won't bring up last year's Christmas party. I kind of predicted my great aunt's death...
I stole an accordion from the bar
Accidentally
I'm having ragrets about stealing the accordion
Clothing is a burden necessitated by propriety.
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