I sometimes wonder how many of the girls I know have done anal...and why none of them have ever dated me.
no. i seriously look so gross with this sunburn. i wouldnt even wanna bang myself. and im really into myself.
meet me or not, i'm out of control
Changed my sheets. Found a can of rockstar, crushed bag of tostitos, used tissues, and enough of both of our clothes to make a whole outfit.
it was like a zeppelin in a condom
The question of "Will I eat a piece of curried chicken off the floor?" has been answered tonight.
new years resolution, not be in jail at midnight for 3rd year in a row.
I JUST REALIZED HOW SOFT YOUR TABLE IS! and I also just started rolling
In that case, I'll try 2 find a date. But my options are AA friends or fuck buddies.
Walked up in time to hear him say "you saw I was in a relationship on facebook? So why are you holding my nuts?" To her. That's loyalty man
I'll pick you up. Avoid slightly awkward no-we're-not-dating-but-I'm-still-screwing-your-son-after-2-years parental run-ins.
Again??? Now we can't ever fucking go there again STOP PEEING IN FOYERS
Woke up naked on your sister's mattress lying next to a single slice of bread.
So unmotivated today.
Who am I kidding. So unmotivated this decade.
Reading becomes significantly more difficult when people are having crazy loud sex in an adjoining room
Randomize