I heard we made out
he threw mangos from the tree he was in at people and got arrested for harassment
I mean, he's dancing back and forth between pathetically sad and massively fucking creepy.
I just overhead some girl saying that she's trying out for the real world so she has a backup if she doesn't get into teach for america...
DUUUDE!! just found out that the fbi has a kids page. guess who's got a new jumior officer printout badge?
just paid a stripper to have a minute conversation about the arizona game WTF
trust me, there is no more disappointing feeling in the world than waking up at 4 in the morning with a random half naked chick in your bed and then realizing your roommates girlfriend just wandered into the wrong room.
Making pb&j crepes. Using corn tortillas. So high. I don't know if I'm offending French people or Mexican people more.
dream priorities were more important than voting today. don't tell me you wouldn't keep going back to sleep to find out who would win a fight between oprah and godzilla
four loko is officially banned. leave it to the kids from a state school to fuck it up for everyone
I clipped one of my extensions in his hair to give him a rat tail. What is my life?
Well we had to pull over on a side street in town so I could throw up while moms were driving by with car loads of kids, I feel like I just performed a lil silent AA film for the childrens
You'll pass into the great gay beyond
Where it rains cosmopolitans and scantily clad gogo dancers of all genders direct traffic
I'm the one who said we should take things slow. I'm also the one who forced him into the back on my car so we could have sex.
OH GOD IT TASTES LIKE IT SMELLS
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