i was like the pretty and slutty 8th grade girl who goes to a party, gets wasted, and ends up having sex with a senoir
details?
alcohol + bed + penis = sex
He's like the fucking Houdini of bras. Not only did I not feel him take it off I didn't find it until two days later.
Wedding cake is always the best dance partner. In the corner. With a jack and coke. And while I'm crying. Listening to "Almost Paradise".
just mapquested my walk of shame from saturday..bye bye freshman 15
My vagina supports interfraternal relations
One guy got his nose broke and was playing with it. Then another guy was playing beer pong off his horse.
Well she got high, deleted the essay she was working on, and then ordered dominos. We all manage stress in different ways.
It's important to establish I slept with her BEFORE we officially became cousins-in-law.
Okay so how much boob would you consider inappropriate for smart casual?
I would've fucked Winston Churchill - rode that D like I was going into battle.
I'm not a morning person, and, trust me, no matter how good your cock may be, it will not turn me into one.
For future reference: When the bouncer is approaching you to remove you from his bar, you don't respond by taking off your pants.
Found out that I went to the same elementary school as the guy I'm hooking up with. Kosher or no
Everyone has seen your nipples. It's like asking if they ever walked on grass. You need better hangover questions.
My vibrator broke.
Dude it's been less than twelve hours. Did you sleep?
Don't worry about that. I need a new vibrator.
Randomize
