Note to self: When getting ready to leave with a kid in a wheelchair don't say Let's roll
We need to start having rules for the weekends. Like no more downing 3 shots because we want to slut dance a little harder or because biggie just came on.
i finally watched harry potter... a tad unrealistic if you ask me... i mean a ginger kid with 2 friends?
Some random slut told me I was a good dancer then gave me a handjob. I felt like fucking John Travolta.
She was giving you that "I really want to blow you but I have to act professional" look. Guaranteed
I wanna get shitfaced and yell about Tim tebow
He told me about how he pissed his pants last weekend like it was a normal part of conversation. Within 10 minutes I was going home with him. I think he put me under some kind of spell.
Maybe just the first 2 wks of Nov can be dick detox.
I woke up with chocolate melted between my tits. I'd say that's a win for all parties involved.
Please put me on a plane and hypontize me into forgetting the little bit of last night that I do remember.
Well I woke up and my arm was bleeding. And my blood is on the wall in the hallway.
Umm
No idea. I blame fireball.
Valid.
Santa tracker drinking game, you in or what?
all im saying is 27 is too old to still be drinking 40s, you make more money than me, buy some decent shit
screw you you golddigging beer snob
He fingerfucked me in the hot tub and then we had sex in the wine cellar. See thats why I like partying with rich people
so after 3 days of looking i found the keg...looks like somebody tried burying behind the garage
Randomize
