i just went dwnstairs and there are 5 guys without their shirts on hugging each other. i think i should leave now
Some girl next to me in class is making a list of whta to pack for spring break & it was a normal list until she put birth control in all caps w/ stars around it
I'm so hungover I took Dramamine to help prevent the motion sickness of walking.
We're learning about the color wheel. Hello college.
They poked me and kept screaming "LAUGH DOUGH BOY" it's like 3rd grade all over again.
Where are you and why am I suddenly responsible for your taquitos?
Just saw a cop give four blondes gas for their car on their way to Vegas. They seriously ran out of gas and called 911 about it. Its like a porno plot.
I bet it kind of sucks while you do community service I'm getting blown in the shower. haha
Mr. Clingalot just ran from our apartment. What the hell?
I started to cry afterward and mumble random things. Examples: "God, please don't make me be so gay anymore" and "my mom is going to be so proud of me for fucking a dude this time." It was that or let him stay the night and cuddle. I mean, fuck that horrible shit I'm a girl that needs her space.
Well for starters, her tits were hairy.
I wonder if you're allowed to smoke pot at Denver bronco games now...
well if they don't get here soon...no fuck it, I'm going to the strip club.
I'm highly inebriated watching star wars, this text was sent via the force
we got cupcakes after we fucked. gives a whole new meaning to sugar daddy
I'm fucked-out. That state of being high between fucked up and passed out.
Randomize
