"romantic friends" sounds more classy then friends with benfits
Shit sorry. Maybe I wont give you this sweet ass fanny pack I found in my parents attic
maybe next time you shouldn't be drinking alone watching intervention at 3 am and no one would think you needed an intervention.
So, do you know where my left shoe is? I mean, we were at a few places last night, and I called them. No luck for me.
She can't really be mad at me. I made you two sisters... Dick sisters.
So hungover. Sitting in class about to puke during this ladys flute performance. Not sure why were having a flute concert in biology
great! i almost saw a gas station fight, and i believe i became the first person to successfully pee and puke in a bathtub simultaneously
Doctorate. Vaginahole. Cinnamon. Rainbow. Fill in the blanks in the morning.
I will miss his soup and his dick the most
You better of fucked him last night or do it now because he is buying all the roommates McDonald's.
I know you're gay. But if I'm not getting dick, then you have to. That's what friends do.
I will give you the couch, a small portion of the fridge, and plenty of beer.
Got my future figured out. I'm oddly comforted. Thanks, bro.
I threw up in my room. And I cleaned it up with a spatula.
My cousin was arrested on a class b felony for selling meth out of the back door of McDonald's where he worked. Apparently it was the extra special sauce.
It was a career choice to be sure... Mistakes were made.
he drove over two hours to fuck me and came in 3 minutes. he got mad when I asked him if it was worth it...
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