I used to practice getting hit by cars.
I just remember her telling me "Hi, my names Kaissa and I'm a lesbian" over and over and over and over again as I was crying.
When sleeping with someone new: should you hide the magnum condoms, or let him know what he has to live up to?
cliffnotes. writing studyguide on last pack of smokes. glad this semester is over.
in light of our recent drunken behavior, i think it's time we seriously consider hiring ourselves a babysitter.
We found a swing set....it's in the front yard.
Never visiting again. You guys drink like immortals
I feel like butter and tequila would be excellent combination. Right now. Please do this in my name.
July fourth my place, drunken bubble slip n slide. Yes this is happening and yes I am 31
wearing my old cheerleader outfit to the bar was a great way to get free drinks. i should do this more often
Munching saltines, sippin Gatorade, and trying not to get eaten by this small horse
We took your mom out drinking and we wound up winning 18 games of Flip Cup. You have amazing genetics.
I'm not even the least bit surprised that I whored myself out for tiramisu
Bra is off & I'm snuggled in a pizza. Adulting is good.
Hey. Did I get punched in the face last night?
Yeah. I told you I would and you didn't believe me.
Randomize
