where are you
in your bedroom
how did you get in
your wife…
WTF
she was a 2....and a legitimate 2. like, helen keller is a 1, this girl...2.
New first...just saw an entire family of homeless hitch hikers...kids and all. God, i love Oklahoma!
Ya know, I lied. I wouldn't mess with him. Not because of the crazy/rehab issues... but because he wears tank-tops.
The prescription for my birth control just blew away in the wind on my way back from the health center. It's like god wants me to get pregnant
And then she apologized after the blow job for being too sick to deep throat. I'm in love..
You've had your dick in my mouth. I don't think there are all that many barriers in our friendship at this point.
Occasionally I curse my inner 15 year old when I'm fulfilling their dreams as a slut, but I roll with it.
Honestly I'm not even that excited to see my boyfriend. I'm more excited to see his penis. His penis inside of me.
As we have told you before, the first rule of hook-up bingo is we don't talk about hook-up bingo
Look, I've got a really big car. We just need to put ourselves in it and put some body parts in other body parts.
I impressed him by taking off my panties without removing my pants.
My autobiography will be 500 pages of the words "I probably should've thought this through" typed over and over.
He said his parents were apparently coming over to surprise him with breakfast and I’ve never gotten dressed and run out of the door that quickly. I have commitment issues.
You ever stub your boner? It happened to me. Just know that drugs and strip poker and a hot tub. I'll Regale you with the story over drinks later.
Randomize
