I envy your ability to put any word in front o the word beer and make drinking before 5 sound like a socially sanctioned event.
my nick name has gotton too long over the years..C.T.P.S.G.F.P.G.......cock tease private school groupie frat party groupie.
i got shots of sambuca dumped on my head last night. my bag still smells like licorice. making me nauseous.
it is a nice little reminder of the bruins dominance. if Vancouver had won, it would somehow smell of maple syrup.
Whenever there is a ShotSki involved, I have no excuse but to drink, right? It's like a rule.
Obviously a higher power wants us to be sunday drunk together
I'm obsessing over hocus pocus right now. What if I change my Grindr profile to "come little children, I'll take thee away to a land of enchantment"
He came over to use the microwave, said he needed to heat up some urine.
Im hitting on this chick at a stoplight when all the sudden. i notice this chick blowing some dude in the backseat.
Ah well. Drinking wouldn't be drinking without mystery bruises
Agreed.
Giiiirl. Just had a BM that almost killed me.
She doesn't even know his real name...he just keeps calling himself Hans the Third
Got hit on by the cable guy. Solid 9. Think Orlando Bloom with a glorious curly mullet.
Just bailed on her the best way possible. Got tickets to the game. Only issue is.... if we lose, we not only lost, but I skipped sex to watch us lose
Did we seriously steal a wet floor sign from McDonald's then get chased down by a homeless man for it? Never drinking again.
u woke up and asked who took ur pants off then realized u did n almost cried over not gettin layed
Randomize
