I think your mom looks like a breed of donkey and elephant, but her boobs are perfect
i want the original willy wonka imagination song to come on when i take a girl to my room
I'm now in all their contact lists as "Pee-Pee Hands"...
She's been divorced three times and use to raise cock fighters. Of course I'm interested in her
Couldn't get it up. She asked me what she was doing wrong. Didn't have the heart to tell her. I appreciated her willingness to adapt, but she's pretty much gonna look that bad her whole life.
The bar has bullet holes in the ceiling, and the country singer had been playing drunken weezer covers. A man just bought me a beer on the grounds that I 'have his back' in a fist fight with a stranger texan. And, yes, the bartender is wearing a sherif's badge
So, I'm tripsitting Ruben cause he's on LSD, and he's starting to eat the chair because 'it is evil' according to him... I can't choose: should I stop him or film it?
I guess the lesson here is that I shouldn't send nudes to elected officials.
you just won the triple crown of sex! your prize is more sex.
what the hell makes you think you get to decide what your going to wear at our weding!?
I know it's my dream I got hurt enough to leave work but not hurt enough to stop drinking
Well I've consulted some psychics but they keep saying all they hear in my head is screaming and all they see in my future is pool noodles and cheese dip?
I'm going to need a penis the size of a bat
Same encounter she body slammed me to the floor and than humped me
His penis is the only thing worth pursuing but all the baggage attached isn't.
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