You go to school with some of the ugliest girls I've ever seen... How are you not getting laid?
Canada: barely better than America at a sport they invented.
Well if I fail my finals for being drunk on Cinco De Mayo there is always next year to graduate.
You said that last year...
... was I dreaming when we did coke off of the xbox, or did that really happen?
He ended up letting us go, I think he just felt sorry for us. It's the only time that my night's gotten worse after I've taken my pants off.
i woke up next to a ladle and a packet of chocolate biscuits that my face had melted into one giant biscuit.
We have 10 gallons of home brew. And james has an amazonian blow dart weapon that sticks in bags and the wall. Come over
Dude between pissing everywhere and all of those frogs, that bathroom got wrecked.
Our penis' have led to more networking than mark zuckerberg.
Wtf man. I knew she was bad news. No sane person cares if you eat their raviolli.
Dollar Store pregnancy tests. For when you sorta wanta know.
They have marijuana tests too!
I was mad at him...then I jerked off. Now I'm over it. Orgasms fix everything, I swear.
I don't remember much, but I remember he called me the dick whisperer, so it must not have been all bad.
I was giving you head in the kitchen, and when I looked up you were eating a quesadilla.
I dont know. He's too private. After you fuck him find out his secrets.
Randomize