literally followed a trail of condoms to the bus stop this morning. Ahh modern-day bread crumbs
Yeaaah, so cabbie laughed at me, and said, "rough nite? Let me find you some music" . apparently OPP is the appropriate ride of shame soundtrack.
when i was alone, his dick was there for me...
Not sure. We'll pass out on that bridge when we stumble to it.
I'm a lady, I can't pee on the ceiling. Even I don't have that power.
Let's learn from last year: Leave the handcuffs at home on St Patrick's Day.
Come part with me. By you sleep! No fun. Idek feelings Sorry for your life.
I was busy. But now I'm about to consume alcohol and chicken. We shall see where this takes us. Maybe to the moon, maybe to the floor. I have no idea.
Dude, you need to man up. You passed out before a PRESEASON game. It's a long season.
You can't just take out your bong for hits in public places... That's what pipes are for. You've got to be stealthier.
No, it's okay because this is the city of trees.
YOU'VE ALREADY BEEN BUSTED MORE THAN ONCE. THAT'S NOT A VALID EXCUSE FOR BONG HITS IN COFFEE GARDEN
It all went downhill when I figured out I could launch myself into people with my crutches
Her tits are absolutely massive. Like ripleys believe it or not shit
I wasn't going to just ask my parents for a damn vibrator for christmas
She had never heard the term "grundle" before. Classiest girl I've met in months
The party pretty much ended once she shit on the couch
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