oh right, i forgot that not everyone has a go-to blowjob
Please explain to me what this has to do with my fantasy to fuck larry king?
HOLY SHIT! Did you see the dick on that Great White Shark?!?!?!
I just took boredom to a whole new level. I just auto-tuned and remixed today's western civ lecture
Peanut butter while high is kinda stressful
If I squint, he looks like Jude Law. But that's kind of a weird face to make during sex.
Just woke up to my stoned boyfriend building a shrine around my bare ass. He'll never leave me.
When my parents ask if I met any nice guys in California, I'm going to answer, "No, but I have gone home with alot of nice girls". Too much, too soon?
Just got a 200 dollar safe, two jars, and a 500 pack of rubber bands.. This doesn't SCREAM drug dealer does it?
...you should fill the cart some more
You're the only guy I know who could convince a lady at the pharmacy to trade you her pain pills for your antibiotics.
Currently looking up Winnie-the-Pooh porn.
I just sent him a message bearing my soul about how much he means to me as a friend and his first response is "are you drunk?"
Shit like this is why I'm a bitch to everyone.
I would like to reiterate that I went to give lessons and ended up having a three way instead
Why would you ask him if you could lick his chest?
He has a very lickable chest
I have all the porn. Be there soon
Who is this?
Randomize
