So it turns out the white chocolate in the bathroom is actually soap
so when am I gonna get some from you?
when you dick grows 3 inches
you scanned your fake to get into the dorm last night and when the lady told you it was the wrong card you looked at her and said this is who i am thursday night
Dude manswers just said that a guy can only cum up to eight times in one day. I'm gonna prove that show wrong.
ha well at least you have goals.
In my defense it was my birthday and I really wanted to do it.
he thanks me after handjobs.
you found the perfect man.
I feel like after all he sees, the dog needs to get baptized.
So I'm up to masturbating three times a day, drunk textin my ex, not doing any hw and I've failed half of my tests so far
Sounds better than last semester
I have officially made out with every girl you've made out with, even the random you met on the Mexico flight
New wedding record, my shirt was off by 8pm!!!
Need your help. Dad's drunk and trying to build a still in the basement.
NM he's asleep in a pile of towels. They need to ease people back into Hockey Night in Canada.
Oh, honey. If you're seeing a girl just for the sex, never doubt that she knows and she's doing the same thing. We're not stupid, we're just craftier than you.
Would it be inappropriate to do a science fair project on whether the type of drunk a person is is determined by nature or nurture
dude you're not even a fucking science major
She was shaving her legs in the neighbors pool when we found her.
Where'd she get the razor?
Not the point.
Almost gave the delivery guy a 34 dollar tip. That high
Randomize
