So would u like to explain why you ate all my pickels and took my 1800?
About that, i have your 1800 on my desk with intentions of returning it but theres nothing i can do about the pickels
dude, never take two tylenol pm and smoke three bowls. i feel like i'm covered in cold ants.
i am about to cut my stepbrother's hair into a mohawk with the same clippers i use to trim my pubes. god is so on my side today.
is it bad that upon arriving to my fourth sex toy party the sex toy lady instantly recognizes me?
According to google history I spent most of last night trying to buy an elephant.
There is tupperware vodka. thats right tupperwares full of vodka. best leftovers ever
I feel like he knows I had a dream about him eating me out in the janitors closet at the holiday party. He's giving me THAT look.
No, he's ok. He just broke his teeth on the stripper pole. No biggie.
Thanks i'm proud of you and I'm proud of beer and vodka for making me drunk
Ohhh,that's true. Babies are only fun when you're high. Otherwise, they're the worst kind of people.
We played alot of beer pong and ventured into the woods with tiki torches
I think he just caught a duck in mid flight
We were fucking while the tv was on, and one of those animal cruelty commercials came on. We then switched over and started doing it doggy style. It was then that I realized that I'm going to hell.
your penis is a great and majestic leader among the penises.
Is there a number of dicks a girl can have in a weekend before it becomes unacceptable? Asking for a friend
Remember! It’sa long weekend and a holiday weekend and it’s America’s birthday! So don’t short change me!
I thought you were asking for a friend
Randomize
