I hate the Packers so much, I wouldn't cheer for them if they were playing al Qaeda.
she complimented my bra when we were hooking up. this lesbian thing has its upsides
Another weekend, another 3 guys I have to awkwardly avoid while crossing campus...
She came over with Guinness cupcakes, a case of Mickeys, wearing an Ireland flag & nothing else.
What do you wear to apply at a strip club?
There's no point in calling it Big Titties Tuesday if girls with big tits don't get anything special
I'm stealing this baby.
Well I always support illegal activity but where would you put it?
She said "I've been waiting to suck your cock since high school." I'm so glad so many freshmen are from our school.
I thought my holiday spirit was gone this year until I got banged to Christmas music. It's back.
LMAO. Stop. Men are such gentleman these days. I woke up with no one beside me and you got 6 cents
6 cents and no orgasm 💃🏻🎉
We are so blessed
Straight up last night my mom was like josh you need to find a job that doesn't include the selling or transporting of drugs
It's 2 am on the long weekend and what am I doing? Sitting alone in my room eating chips and queso and watching Rio. Fuck I need to get laid.
I FOUND A VIBRATOR IN MY BABY BROTHERS ROOM. IM FREAKIN OUT MAN ITS BIGGER THEN MINE
put it back and chill out ok
NO FUCK HES 15 WHO EVEN SOLD HIM THAT HES A BABY
i'd like to schedule a penis for 4pm please.
I think I left my bra and my crocs in your room
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