did you know they have Ed Hardy school supplies at Target? it's like folders and notebooks for little douchebags in training.
Best news ive heard all week. The cougars r coming! The cougars are coming!
you know that annoying kid in my psych class? accidentally hit him in the face with a door today. perfect end to the semester.
My vagina just recognized that song.
There's a point around the one and a half minute mark where the keg stand goes from impressive to pathetic
Gin and redbull in a wine glass. They think I'm keeping my wits with a really yellow Chardonnay. Gonna get ugly after a couple.
We ate a mysterious delivered pizza which no one ordered and then the wii wouldn't work so 20 of us watched porn on two laptops. Drunk took the awkward away.
The window painters skipped us. They didn't know what to do with the giant SMOKE WEED in the window. So they just skipped it.
Someone just walked into the bar with a pillow
I don't know whether to judge him or give him a high five
Also, I want you to know, that not only am I apparently the expert on sexting. Our bishop is consulting me later. So my talents are varied.
Btw kudos to your tongue last night. Sorry about that lady jizz in your beard.
I'm sure he'll make the rejection quick and completely justified.
someone commented on last weekends photos impressed that so many homeless people wanted to take pictures with us. weird that those "homeless people" are our friends... right?
EVEN AFTER ALL THAT COMPLAINING... STILL NO PENIS
i think she learned that just cuz half shots were easier, doesnt mean she can have triple as many.
Randomize
