More dangerous that a broken heart and a shotgun.
watching hot guy on train scrolling with his blackberry's track ball... o to be that track ball...
ill find time for any girl whos not afraid to grab my junk in front of 100 people
i hate always having to make my eye shadow look really good since my eyes always end up closed by the end of the night in pics
You know there's only so much I can do with a great personality.
Thanks for putting the blue stuff in the toilet, it made me throwing up this morning more enjoyable.
They asked if I was about to puke and my response was to laugh and suddenly throw up. Continuing my asshole streak I kept laughing while still vomiting.
If you call getting home safe by sprinting down Spanish Harlem barefoot still rolling then ya I made it
From now on when a guy sends me a dick picture I'm going to send them a picture of some other dudes dick.
Giiiirl. Just had a BM that almost killed me.
My manager just held my hair while I threw up in a dumpster. New low.
Rebecca hasn't has this number in 3 months. Please tell all her friends to stop calling at 3 am. We are not interested in buying or selling drugs nor do we want to hook up with anyone. You all need to go to rehab.
The lady that was sitting beside me thought the best way to cheer herself up was to pet and ruffle my hair while crying and telling me her problems...
the wedding party just walked in to the song eye of the tiger. i'm getting drunk.
His parents bailed him out, the police said they found him on a curb trying to call people on his wallet, hahha. He had his wallet open to his ear callin people
Randomize