I'm gunna smoke cigs today. I feel like I'm in that powerful and gritty mood which requires them
Would you object to my putting the bidet video on my Facebook page? It;s awesome.
and then I told her I was too drunk. She started to cry, and told me this always happens to her and that she thinks shes ugly. I pretended I was asleep and then she farted.
i no longer feel bad for not doin my schoolwork. im watching a porn in french. this MUST qualify as studying.
my purse only fit my wallet or the martini shaker. it wasnt even a question of which i was bringing.
I just remember thinking that if i ran really fast through the house, no one would notice i was naked.
Hungover snowboarding. Puked off the lift and traumatized a group lesson for kids. Crash course on adulthood.
Found a guy passed out on the coffee table with a thong duct taped from ear to ear.
Btw any and all sexual fantasies or arousal I had about cops is null and void.
I think I'm just going to go like every guy on tinder who has a jetski. I'm doing this for us, Summer is coming.
I ate so much cake that I can't even enjoy a blowjob
That's the most first world problem I've ever heard in my life.
Last night i walked into a gas station to get condoms. I threw them on the counter and the guy gave me a funny look because i was wearing a bra under an open cardigan and no shoes. I screamed "DONT JUDGE ME!" and he gave them to me for free.
yea i'll help you find a man. but, when I say jump, you say on who.
are you comparing glasses to pregnancy
she's 6'2. you bet your ass i slept with her.
Randomize
