I'm bringing poparts in case anyone gets hungry. The trek to frat row is strenuous.
and then when she swallowed her birth control with a shot of vodka and looked in my direction, i knew it was time to go.
This whole living in Ohio thing is getting reaaaaallly old.
You just got cockblocked by Conan O'Brien.
i was trying to give him roadhead and my tits kept knocking his cheap shifter into neutral...was the first time my tits have ever cock blocked me
dude i should have never cleaned my ears out while high. theres no going back.
Sleeping with random people is the same as soul searching, right? Ps that wasn't a team name suggestion.
jake and the teradactyl broke up, operation get high and find him a new girl who hasn't had sexual experiences with three delts simultaniously is in full effect.
So she just had an emotional breakdown over a birthday card with a peacock on it. Yeah. She's pretty drunk, but we made it home safely.
Moonshine marathon is never a good idea
And that facial hair. He might as well shave it so it spells "douche" on one cheek and "nozzle" on the other.
So for St Paddys day I colored my junk green and got a little hat for him....wanna see it before I sober up....
I used the line "you don't have enough pillows". Then left. Thought you should know.
don't let your emotions get tangled in that sexy beard of his.
Mandatory face masks - finally, a solution for lip augmentation failures and bad breath.
Randomize
