the bus pole looks like a man who feels guiltyty about something
carls jr on main st. japanese tourist taking a dump in the urinal. reading a japanese newspaper and wearing a full suit.
be there in 3 mins
just woke up and my boobs have "fun police" written on them
Is it bad that I voted for Scott Brown because I want to fuck him?
Nah. I did too.
We did it and he fell asleep and I was bored so I decided to go back to the party...is that bad?
She begged me for sex again. I felt like I was telling a homeless person I didn't have any change.
I just watched a woman break three wood planks with her boobs. I don't know how I feel about that
I found a map from his room to his bathroom this morning in my purse. Apparently I was too fucked up to get there without one.
I barely remember the girls that I got pregnant, you think I'm gunna remember the ones that played handball
How do you initiate sexting are u supposed to be like yo I'm peeing and eating a clif bar and texting and thinking about you naked all at the same time
I guess that's what I get for clicking on a link that says clown penis.
So besides your brother walking in on you shaving and singing "I'm gonna get asssss" how was your night
He uses Bing as his search engine...but he's great in bed. So obviously I'm torn.
I kind of really want to call off the engagement but I kind of need his mom's mashed potatoes on thanksgiving so I'm between a rock & a hard place here
i think i just naturally attract stoners
Randomize