i don't mind that he's uncut. i like it! it's like a little sweater!
a cock doensn't need a sweater! especially a skin sweater! wtf.
That's like some buffalo bill hannibal lector shit.
I bet a guy could be masturbating under the table now and people would just think he was clapping along.
my step dad just called me a drunken slut..someone in my family finally understands me
just got carried INTO the bar by 4 people. it's like watching my weekend in reverse.
Well now I have my semen on her headphones
I just feel as thought we should spend the day in which we celebrate relationships the same as how we started them. Drunken hook ups.
I don't have nearly enough visine for the dryness from sticking my head out the window on the freeway for 20 minutes. Child lock me next time.
I'm going to see if it catches on fire again, then I'll make the decision.
Threesome in a minivan. New low
So was it you or me who decided it was a good idea to inscribe fuck you on the counter?
That was me. Just a 'welcome to our home' kinda thing.
Are we doing anything tonight after class for Valentine's Day or just being lazy and having sex?
If you expect me to say anything other than 'lazy and sex' you're crazzzzy!
Get here, there are important joints to be smoked and pies to be eaten
I was loaded. my pee still has a hint of lime
Wouldn't life be so much easier if you could just walk up to attractive men and say, "Let me bear your children" and it wouldn't be creepy?
Or possibly end in a restraining order?
I just found weed in my bra #magicboobs2k16
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