just smoked a bowl with my history teacher. i love community college
is he the 3rd person to bang everyone in our group?
You sucked on the drag queens heel. It got that rough.
Its official. I've reentered slutty territory. I was a condom away from having sex in a childs playhouse at a park. Oh and I lost my car keys.
I'm sexting at the thanksgiving dinner table...this is a new holiday tradition.
I wish a box of wine came w a hose. It'd be so much easier to drink from.
I think this shark week should consist of getting drunk enough to actually go hunt sharks ourselves.
dude girls our age are getting married and having babies and I still can't figure out how to defrost my hotpockets
yeah im watching him make his speech now. cant take him seriously tho. hes talking about funding for education and all i can think about is how ive seen what he looks like wearing womens underwear...
WHY DO I KEEP FINDING CHICKEN THROUGHOUT THE HOUSE? GET YOUR ASS HOME NOW!
Also. I think I just got sentimental over a nude
LIKE ALL I WANT TO CURE MY HANGOVER IS PORKROLL AND LIKE 85% OF THIS COUNTRY DOESN'T KNOW WHAT IT IS
so my dads pretending to use the snow blower and theres absolutley no snow one the ground.... someone should really lock our liqour cabinet
Your dad was just slow dancing with the priest and holding a beer. Classic
If we both don't have awesome filthy sexual experiences to share in the morning...we are no longer best friends.
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