hahahahahahhahahahaha. 26, Dominican, has a funny accent, thinks I'm hot. Tots boning.
Nope changed our mind. Decided your strange bacon like body odor wasn't what we want to smell tonight.
i was picked up off the floor by a stripper, if thats not a new life low then i dont know what is.
All we did was argue about ponys and drug dealers
NO. NO LET HIS PENIS TOUCH YOU.
There's gotta be a happy medium between the guys who only want to sleep with me and the ones that respect me too much to try to sleep with me.
Yea. I couldn't get a job in fast food but I can teach Americas youth. The future looks great
We bonded over the fact that we each, separately, got arrested on the same weekend.
Considering the fact that everyone took the wrong jacket from that party, should we casually try to return the chalice and soccer ball we stole from last night?
I think my body is a cloud. This mixture of things is heavenly. Dare was wrong, drugs are awesome.
I feel as bad as you right now. I'm about to use one girls car to go see another one
Fuck ya. But normally I drove one girls car picking up a different girl while texting another girl lol
He took initiative. Dragged me into the kitchen and did me on the stove....while it was on! And then we made nachos.
Xanax and cookies, it's good to be home
Woke up with an entire pizza face down in my bed beside me... untouched. Never beer bong a whole bottle of wine.
I collect Covid conspiracy theories like I collect Pokemon.
Randomize
